Terror Aftermath

In the recent times our country. in fact the whole world has been grappling with one of the worst cases of terrorism..a case in which the target is the innocent, secular common man. and after his death there is no body to mourn except his close relatives. Just put yourself in the place of one his close relatives and instantaneously you will feel a hot surge of anger as to " WHY? ...why him?  why anybody as a matter of fact?"Right now we might be more concerned about the fall of AIG, Lehman and the ever erratic Sensex but in order to tackle these problems we ourselves have to be vigilant. It is not that we have to work like policemen but we should not do any activity(discussion writeups) that further harms the thin thread of harmony that exists somewhere.
The world is already slipping into an era where majority of the social interaction occurs through the internet. With these kind of blasts people will recede more and more to their respective homes and the only persons they will be able to talk comfortably are their friends and relatives. A cloud of ambiguity and doubt has covered the whole of the subcontinent.

To Study or not?

Nowadays an eerie inquisitiveness has crept inside me. Should I study at all? How will this subject help me in future? Am i going to gain anything from this shit? These are small questions that arise in everybody's mind and normally are considered as foolish trivial thoughts. 

But they are not so on the eve of the exam at 2 in the morning. During this time they become one of the deciding factors of the fate of my performance. Sometimes my answer is "No , not of any use" I switch on my monitor and ..............Results :  Av- by a huge amount.

Sometimes though the answer is "Yes they are of use and i should do ____ proud by studying this subject...blah blah". I go back to studying.......night-out......results Av- but by a small amount.

Now I am in a state that no incentive whatsoever remains for me to open my book and mindlessly gobble information. The learning mechanism has rusted( thanks to 2nd year ) and hopes for a bright future has in turn given way to "Abe jo hoga dekha jaayega".

I am seriously confused how far will this attitude take me but for some reason or so i cannot remove it from my system.